Finding Strength of Will

So far this has been the story of my journey.  A lot of it has been about the confusion and the questions I've had as well as lots of other heavy stuff.  This is about lighter things, still part of my journey, but a very different part.  I wanted to include some of the reasons why I look forward to each day.   My children never cease to amaze me.  I continually learn from them, even when I think it's me that is supposed to be teaching them. Several days ago I got in an argument with my oldest son.  After asking him to stop spraying the other kids with water, I finally sent him inside with an extra chore to do.  He stormed off to his room and we then yelled at each other for a bit.  He was upset that I hadn't reminded him that I didn't want him spraying everyone.  Feeling like I needed to give him some direction, I held my ground and informed him that no one else in life is responsible for his actions except him and that he needed to go ...

I’m writing this in hopes that it will help clear my mind and because I need to do something.  I need to act, more than I have.  I just spent some time sobbing on my bathroom floor as frustration and a mess of other emotions overwhelmed me.  I just listened to Elder Oaks’ talk on where God wants me to stand on the topic of Gay Marriage.  And I believe all that he said.  I truly do.  I have already thought through and lived with the bulk of his statements.  I am a gay man, married to a woman, with children of my own.  I have seen the blessings of being married to a woman and I will affirm the importance of it to anyone who asks with no proof other than what I have experienced in my own life.  But it is still a challenge, sometimes a daily challenge to wade through the complexities of living as a man who is sexually attracted to men instead of women.  At times I feel as if I am single handedly sparing with generations of social stigmas a...

I suppose by making public some of what is commonly reserved as personal that we are inviting criticism, and I'm OK with that.  But what astounds me is the certainty which many people seem to have that I and my wife are making the wrong decision.  Is it too simple to believe that we could really have found our soul mate, the peson that we want to spend our life with, in spite of our differences? Because it is that simple.  My wife and I have chosen to make a go at this life together.  We hold sacred the importance of family.  We believe that the whole is greater than the sum of the parts.  We feel that the best chance we have is to face this side-by-side, as partners, best-friends, lovers, and equals.  We believe in true love.  We believe in God and that He is our support.  We believe that we are not just as we are now and will always be so -- we believe that we are meant to constantly try to improve ourselves, and that it is possible to ...

The fondest memory I have of my Grandma is her love of Robert Frost.  Many were the times she shared these words with me: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. * I remember still her voice, her smile, and the kind look in her eyes as she spoke.  A twinkle of joy and wisdom.  As a small child I remember the distinct impression that she knew a secret, and that it was contained in those few words. How poignant this has become in my life as I have chosen the road less traveled by. Today I shared my story with a friend.  The usual fear and doubt were present, the questions, the hesitation.  But once again I felt a gentle urging and encouragement.  As surprised as she was to hear my story, I was equally surprised to find that she had a great understanding and compassion.  Someone close to her lives with this and has been less fortunate than I. For a while now I have been strug...