My thoughts on making a Mixed-Orientation Marriage work and be happy

A lot of people don’t think very highly of mixed orientation marriages and a lot of people would like them to just go away. Many people believe they just can’t and don’t work. At the same time though we all love a good unlikely love story.  Everything from Beauty in the Beast to Little Mermaid to Shrek. They are all unlikely love stories.

Nick Vujicic’s was born without arms or legs. He never thought he would find love. A few years ago he did, and this is what his wife said of him:
"The moment I saw him, I saw his eyes and his smile. I thought to myself oh my gosh, he is so handsome.  To me he is prince charming. He might now be perfect in the exterior but he is a perfect match for me."



He will never be able to hold his wife, yet she is happily married and they are expecting their 2nd child soon.


Donna Eden is an award winning author of Energy Medicine. Her husband David Feinstein is a clinical psychologist . She was an alternative gal who is about as alternative medicine as you can get. David was a very medical clinical psychologist. The two had NO hope of a relationship working! The experts on both sides of the spectrum; alternative and very medical psychologist and therapist didn’t think there marriage would last any time at all. They have now been married 38 years. They just wrote a book a book together about love. The book begins, “If we can make it, we sometimes joke or half-joke, any couple can make it.”



In a nutshell, this is what Lucas and I believe it takes to make a MOM marriage work and for the matter any good marriage or just even any good relationship. 

-Both being willing to see what you do have. (Not focusing on what you don't have.) 

-Both being willing to work on their own stuff; their own baggage, their own perceptions, their own insecurities, and their own challenges. 

-Both people being willing to work on your friendship and to spend time together working and playing. 

-Both people being willing to get on the same page, or reasonably close page, when issues arise and being willing to talk it out and really communicate. 

-Both of you wanting to make it work and willing to do the work that it takes.

Be honest with yourself. Acknowledge your own insecurities especially  when you are upset, angry and/or frustrated at the other person.  Make sure it is really an issue with them; not your own insecurities and/or baggage that you are really feeling. 

(Yes these are all things Lucas and I have to work on, sometimes daily..or more... but we try really hard and at times succeed quite well. :) ) 

Comments

  1. Thank you, Lucas and Wrylon, for telling your story so openly and honestly. You represent us well.

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  2. You guys are amazing! You are both such accomplished people, because of your choices. You have such a beautiful relationship and are so generous to let us all eavesdrop. You provide the proof that we have far more control over whom we give hearts to than the world would have us believe. Thank you for your bravery in being the ACTUAL minority and doing such a beautiful job of it. I absolutely adore you guys!!

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